Monday, December 1, 2008

all i want for christmas is lowgrade narcolepsy

this morning i exited the 405 at exit 26 in bothell. took the right hand side of the two left turn lanes. light turns green, left lane starts moving, mine doesn't. i figure someone is broke down. so everybody jumps over to the right. the small-penised man in the giant lifted red truck behind me (gotta love the eastside) chirped out in the process, but my efficient wonder of a vehicle got out ahead of him. now i see that the problem is a little truck stopped in the lane. no hazard lights, no movement from inside. i was about to get out and check on the dude, but the guy ahead of me who was parallel to the vehicle in question got out first. i poked my head out my window and said "are they alright?" he just kind shrugged. at this point i assume someone is dead inside the cab. maybe a heart attack, maybe an aneurysm. perhaps a perforated colon. i started to think about how tragic it would be to die parked at a stop light. maybe tragic isn't the right word. pathetic. there we go. ever since i have been wondering how i would like to die. many people, mostly men, would suggest it would be best to go mid-coitus. others would say in your sleep. i personally want to die in an inferno of awesome glory. what that means, i don't exactly know.

the guy was asleep - in case you were wondering.

so how do you want to die?