i've become quite good at doing very little actual work while appearing to work my butt off. here is my list of pointers:
- look frustrated. this can be achieved by sighing loudly (which i already do as a tic), rubbing your face a lot or moving quickly past your bosses office.
- send out emails. lots of them. short, to the point emails that tell people things they already know, but written in the spirit of "just so everyone is on the same page". make sure the boss sees them.
- find minor points of policy and practice. interpret them in the strictest way possible then go to your supervisor with a proposal of how to adhere to them. quixotically cling to your proposal for as long as possible, long after any sane person would have said "you're right - that's just unreasonable".
- be away from your desk for as long as possible. find a quiet area in the building where people rarely if ever go to. stay there for a while. if someone does walk in make sure you can quickly grab something and look busy.
- carry moderately sized piles of folders or documents with you everywhere you go.
- occasionally take on a small piece of work for someone else, but do so with great pomp. "ohh man, i don't know when i'll be able to get to it, but if you leave it for me i'll squeeze it in by friday"
- complain. not about co-workers though. that never works. instead wail about your workload, but use this sparingly. it's like cayenne pepper - a little goes a long way.
- take on giant projects that no one has ever been able to tackle before. work on them VERY slowly. not only is there a low expectation for success, but also if you do fail it can be chalked up to the inherent difficulty which others before you obviously faced, which is why it was never done in the first place.
